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Dear All -

There is a proverb, Chinese if I'm not mistaken, that the guardians of the truth
are Paradox and Confusion.

In the inquiry we termed Alien Research in PE, we come upon the revelation that
what we find out is actually about ourselves.

It is paradoxical that in finding out about others, I'm whom I discover and that
in that discovery, I come upon "We."  Listening and reactions included.

Love,
Robyn

InaRuth@aol.com wrote:

> Ina here:
>
> A few responses.
>
> To Brian on Accountability:  Yes.  I find the discussion slippery and hate
> slippery conversations.It seems to me that some definitions of accountability
> sounds more like promises and agreements than a state of being.  Perhaps
> accountability is both.  I am accountable in my business for a lot of areas,
> no promises, no agreements.  Just the buck stops here - actually for
> everything.  Period.  I had one discussion with a major customer who was
> unhappy with something one of my employees did.  I thought he would go into
> shock when I told him that as CEO, I'm responsible for everything that goes on
> in my business.  Believe I went up a few more notches out of that one.
>
> So what if accountability can be both a way of being (stands) as well as
> doings (promises, agreements and actions)?
>
> We would then need to distinguish "No Adult As possibility without
> accountability"  Right now, as in the conversation at my homework group,
> that's the quandry.
>
> Janet and Jean,
>
> While I much appreciate listening as a skill, I also appreciate anyone
> attempting to communicate and distinguish something in inquiry.  Few words can
> be marvelous - being succinct.  There is a time and place for it.
>
> I'd like to share one of the best tools I learned from Werner and out of
> leading Introductions to the Forum and being a Seminar Leader.  Werner used to
> call it "mining the gold".  It's a listening skill referred to in other words
> in my field.  You can see it occuring in seminars with really good seminar
> leaders.  The basic principle is that you listen to what someone is saying,
> sift through the dirt to get to the gold.  What I discovered was necessary to
> do that was to totally suspend my judgements and evaluation.  To have an
> already always listened - designed - that there's gold in them there words -
> and my job is to listen to find it.
>
> Listening is a trained skill.  It is not simply being passive or allowing
> words to wash over oneself.  In fact, listening, as an active co-creative act
> in the communication process is a more demanding action than the speaking.  In
> our culture, we tend to focus on the speaking - only 50% of the action.  So,
> while I can empathize that some people in this group occur some ways for me
> while others occur other ways, it's usually my judgement and evaluations that
> get in my way of listening everyone keenly.  Now the question is, does
> everyone deserve to be listened to keenly?  Only if they're human.  If they're
> adroids, no.
>
> love and kisses,
> i




From ab@e24mp.demon.co.uk Fri Aug  7 14:40:27 1998
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