to Dance?
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Thanks, Kate.  Robyn here.

Language I'm speaking: compassion
To whom: fully functioning adults
For what: generosity

What you said brought to mind a conversation Brian Regnier was having with
the Wisdom Course Leaders when at Course Leader Days one time. (I think that
was where it was... he said a lot of the same things on different occasions.)

Anyway - and I paraphrase: that any perceived threat or danger drives up
racket and that, therefore it is wise to arrange life to minimize threat
where possible. In other words, be smart about it.

Sometimes I forget that being human is a permanent condition as long as I'm
alive. Might as well get good at including that, taking it into
consideration, embracing the "gap," eh?

Not boring, Kate. Which brings up another topic:

As for the conversation about bottom-lining it or not, I can appreciate the
opposite viewpoint, but  I'm for people talking however it best suits them -
I find that when I don't have time or space for all of it, I skim. Other
times, I'm totally enriched by being drawn a whole picture; I learn more
about how the thinking was fleshed out and about the person writing.  The
nice thing about email is that we can choose when and how much to read,
unlike being in a seat in a course.

I also don't want us to be "walking on eggshells" in terms of worrying about
how much to write and apologising and all that. It was just after the 4th
weekend that I finally got added into this email list and it has been the
single most powerful contributing factor in my becoming deeply engaged in PE.

Much love,
Robyn

snhemail@juno.com wrote:

> > I was also pondering the question of what has us feel *hurt* by
> >others.
> >
> > What language I speak inquiry
> > To whom - explorers
> > For what - expansion and healing
> >  >>
> >
> Hi this is Kate
>
> When I saw this question, I had to talk about it.  Shirley and I
> discussed it during a walk in the rain the other night.  Here's what we
> could see
>
> for me, there are at least a couple of triggers that hurt
> There are the one's we commonly call unfullfilled expectations.
> Sometimes these expectations are not out of the ordinary, sometimes they
> are and sometimes it is out of the ordinary (or the previously agreed to)
> that a specific person has not done what we have expected.  There can be
> a shift in the relationship between for some unfulfilled expectations -
> at best I can to get off it.
>
>  Another type is what I call getting hooked by my past.  These are the
> one's where I have experienced the same circumsatnces with various others
> at various times of my life.  Definitely a continuing saga and I get hurt
> in the saga.  Whether I am hurt in the current situation needs some
> distinguishing - usually the answer is no and my best response, when I
> have ahold of myself, is to acknowledge to myself and others that I got
> hooked.
>
> A third type is what I call having possibility get kicked in the stomach.
> I usually have not yet articulated the possibility and only distinguish
> that there was a possibility when this kind of hurt gets triggered.  I
> think that these hurts are key to distinguishing for oneself the
> possibilities that are uniquely you.  Something that we talked about on
> the Greek Cruise.
>
> Shirley was more cut and dry about it.  Hurt is something that happens to
> you as your identity and it has a lot to do with the survival of your
> identity. 'Hurt' is shy of 'wounded' which is shy of 'mortally wounded'
> or 'killed off'.  The wording gives the identity's game away (as usual)
> and it is easy in this context to see that this kind of hurt lives in
> interpretation.  If it was real we would get first aid or go to the
> emergency room.  She also noted that upsets are more fleeting than hurts.
>  If you get upset in reality you are usually on the ground after a fall
> or a bump and get up, dust yourself off (look around to see who noticed)
> and go on with your life.
>
> That's all the pontificating I have for now.  Hope you weren't bored.
>
> Kate



> > I was also pondering the question of what has us feel *hurt* by
> >others.
> >
> > What language I speak inquiry
> > To whom - explorers
> > For what - expansion and healing
> >  >>
> >
> Hi this is Kate
>
> When I saw this question, I had to talk about it.  Shirley and I
> discussed it during a walk in the rain the other night.  Here's what we
> could see
>
> for me, there are at least a couple of triggers that hurt
> There are the one's we commonly call unfullfilled expectations.
> Sometimes these expectations are not out of the ordinary, sometimes they
> are and sometimes it is out of the ordinary (or the previously agreed to)
> that a specific person has not done what we have expected.  There can be
> a shift in the relationship between for some unfulfilled expectations -
> at best I can to get off it.
>
>  Another type is what I call getting hooked by my past.  These are the
> one's where I have experienced the same circumsatnces with various others
> at various times of my life.  Definitely a continuing saga and I get hurt
> in the saga.  Whether I am hurt in the current situation needs some
> distinguishing - usually the answer is no and my best response, when I
> have ahold of myself, is to acknowledge to myself and others that I got
> hooked.
>
> A third type is what I call having possibility get kicked in the stomach.
> I usually have not yet articulated the possibility and only distinguish
> that there was a possibility when this kind of hurt gets triggered.  I
> think that these hurts are key to distinguishing for oneself the
> possibilities that are uniquely you.  Something that we talked about on
> the Greek Cruise.
>
> Shirley was more cut and dry about it.  Hurt is something that happens to
> you as your identity and it has a lot to do with the survival of your
> identity. 'Hurt' is shy of 'wounded' which is shy of 'mortally wounded'
> or 'killed off'.  The wording gives the identity's game away (as usual)
> and it is easy in this context to see that this kind of hurt lives in
> interpretation.  If it was real we would get first aid or go to the
> emergency room.  She also noted that upsets are more fleeting than hurts.
>  If you get upset in reality you are usually on the ground after a fall
> or a bump and get up, dust yourself off (look around to see who noticed)
> and go on with your life.
>
> That's all the pontificating I have for now.  Hope you weren't bored.
>
> Kate






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